F is for A Fart in a Whirlwind

This is like my brain with a million thoughts going on all the time

Boy, my day is like this a lot of the time.  I have way too many things on my plate and too many projects going at one time in order to accomplish the completion of everything on my list at any given time.

It seems a “monkey wrench” gets thrown into the middle of things and soon I’m off on a different path fixing a different problem.  Perhaps I lack the focus I need, but I always have good intentions and am an eternal optimist.  I ALWAYS think I can accomplish everything on my list when in reality I know I never can, however I never throw in the towel and admit defeat until the end.  I’ll stay up until past midnight trying to finish a task.  I’m not sure why I’m this way over everything in my life.  Who do I get this from in my family?

I don’t know the answer to that, but everyday I wake up with the same optimism as the day before.  I’m not sure if that’s a bad thing, or a good thing.  I do accomplish things everyday, but not all I want to.  That rarely happens because I get sidetracked by unexpected things that arise that have to be dealt with NOW.  However, the list is still on my mind and I get back to it as soon as I can.  Staying up until the wee hours to accomplish something has never bothered me.  I’d much rather go to bed exhausted and know I finished the project than go to bed and think about it, letting it keep me awake.

So am I an odd duck, or do more of you think this way?  Yes, I realize there’s always tomorrow and another day to work on the task at hand, but it really bothers me to leave something unfinished that I think is important.  Maybe I need therapy.  Who knows?  All I know is once my mind is set on something there’s no stopping me, unless the situation is beyond my control.

I’ll tell you a story.

I really wanted to enter the very first ABNA (Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award) contest that Amazon held in 2008.  I had worked five years on my novel.  The deadline was coming to have the book finished so I could enter.  I was very determined.  That was the first time I stayed up three whole days without sleeping.  I’ve done it a few times since then, but always when hubby is out of town.  He’d have a cow because he sees nothing more important than “keeping a normal schedule” for everything.

I did get the contest entered, but I was delirious from lack of sleep.  I ran the coffeepot nonstop.  Paper adorned the floor of my office like it had been hit by a whirlwind.  I wore my sweats and didn’t bother to shower, or clean up the entire time.  I worked frantically on my novel to make sure it was formatted correctly and there weren’t any typo’s, etc. 

Of course, at the last minute there was a snafu, which is the story of my life.  First, I couldn’t find the CD I needed with all the entry instructions.  It was buried somewhere on my office floor under that paper stack.  Then my internet went down.  I rushed to my neighbors and luckily they hadn’t left for vacation yet.  He was nice enough to let me use his laptop to submit my entry.  I felt bad about holding them up, so I worked as quickly as I could to enter all the information they needed and to upload my manuscript.

Once I was back at home, I felt great—mission accomplished.  I collapsed on the couch for some much needed rest.

I only tell you this story because that’s how dedicated to the cause I become about everything I undertake.  Sometimes this attitude can really be a situation and cause all sorts of problems in my personal life.  But I am what I am and not likely to change after six decades.